You might not believe this: Those who put up a bright bubbly face are those with the darkest minds.
Our society demands us to be agreeable, accomodating, and entertaining. But sometimes we need some time to just be with ourselves. Leave us for a moment alone, one sip of coffee, one sip of breath, and there comes the unwelcomed darkness. The weight on our shoulder. The fogginess and heaviness of our minds.
You might think we are depressed. You might think it’s just a passing moment of bad mood. You might think at some point we must have gotten used to it. But it is not, and we are not.
Those feelings are always there. The darkness and heaviness are always there breathing at our nape. We just refuse to acknowledge them sometimes. We just force ourselves to keep our head above water. We manage to make them stay at bay until we can have a moment alone and let them flood in to be processed.
So if at times we seem to withdraw from the world, please give us that precious moment. We are letting ourselves drown to digest and clear up. Just give us a fleeting moment to drown by choice in the ebb and flow of our own universe. Space is all we need. We are drowning, yes, but we actually need it to stay alive.
Soon enough we will emerge from the dark water and come back with our usual smile and spirit. We space out in order to come back swinging. And we will love you more if you understand this.
It is a tough confession. It is dark. But it is the truth.
19 APRIL 2016, 12:21 pm